And the ladies? Why, they will be at their civilized best in the parlour, sipping a cup of highly prized tea. Now that TWG, the global leader in luxurious leaves, has opened a store in Vancouver, there really is no excuse to not match the quality of your brew to the aspirations of your posh festive bash. Clearly, once you’ve stumped up $1,000 for a hand-painted gold teapot, you’ll want to fill it with tea coated in 24-karat gold (no, we are not making this up). A pound of Gold Yin Zhen is a mouth-watering $10,500 and will, according to TWG, afford you “a talisman, a magic potion which yields a swirling and sparkling infusion with marvellous honeyed overtones.” What more could you ask?
Cognac and cigars
Come on, if you’re going to put on a show, stick with tradition. What’s the point of having a room decked out like a country house library, all wingback chairs and leather chesterfields, if you’re not going to shoo the men in there and make them drink cognac and smoke cigars? They need their own space for that stocks, shares and golf course locker-room talk, after all. This one’s a no-brainer: a jeroboam of Remy Martin Louis XIII is just $25,000 at the BC Liquor Store and will wash down the fumes of the rolled leaves beautifully.
And what of that tobacco? A box of 50 limited edition Padróns ($8,500), each cigar individually numbered and aged for 10 years and released to celebrate the company’s 50th anniversary, should put a big fat smile on the boys’ faces.
Is there anything more Marie-Antoinette than the macaron? Little airy puffs of jewelled meringue, glued together with colour-coordinated ganache. Two bites and they’re gone—a fleeting morsel of sweetness, a triumph of style over substance. And what better way to celebrate meaningless materialism than to elevate the elitism and make the macarons half the size for twice the price. You’re excited, aren’t you? Well, give the Vancouver Ladurée store a call, and order a dozen luxury pyramids of their trademark mini versions—for extra vulgarity, they’ll happily decorate them with the likes of gold leaf. Money talks.
When it comes to pure class, clichés are there to be worn as a badge of pride. Nothing says classic rich than a kilo of caviar, right? And it really doesn’t get more serious than a big tin of beluga. Big, fat, creamy fish eggs at $9,650 a pop are just what you need to get this party started.
A party isn’t a party without bubbles, right? And yes, there are some stellar B.C. and European sparkling wines out there to be enjoyed, but that’s not the point of this particular soirée now, is it? Oh no. These bubbles have to be full-on statement bubbles, and what says “I’m rich and I want you to know my net worth is bigger than yours” better than serving Bollinger’s best? Crystal? Oh yes, at $9,000 a bottle for the 1998, this fizz is seriously big. Just make sure your servers know how to hold the bottles properly: there can be no nonchalance about the label being front and centre. That is the point, after all.
BCLiving helps you pull off that big fat party with these over-the-top treats
It’s party time, and nothing says how truly fabulous you are than the quality of your nibbles and drinks. You’re new to this tony neighbourhood, you paid a whopping multimillion-dollar figure for this ridiculously fat home, and now it’s time to show everyone that you are the biggest, spendiest and best new kids on the block. To save you the trouble of actually thinking about your guests’ comfort and pleasure, we’ve pulled together a list of the must-haves at any Big Fat Party this season.